Relationships are the biggest learning field in our lives. As socials beings, we are involved in the most diverse networks of relationships. Our experiences from childhood, family, marriage, relationships, school and/ or the workplace determine the perceptions we have.
We experience and interpret events based on experiences we have made. Due to the negative experiences, fears and reservations we gained, we often re-create particular situations based on these experiences and feelings. It is the task of our subconscious mind to protect us from traumatic experiences. As adults, we have other mechanisms to protect us unlike to when we were a child.
Therefore, this perception is not always correct, often times not even needed, and yet it prevents us from being open to experience new situations and relationships. Psych-K helps us identify these beliefs, and replace them with new supportive beliefs. New experiences become possible as a result.
The most common relation issues in my practice are those between partners. Often it is of sexual nature as is with the case below:
The following is a story of a man who came to see me for his libido issues. Despite the fact that he was in a happy and respectful relationship with a loving partner, he lost his drive for any sexual activity with his partner. This circumstance created a rift between the two involved people. His partner sought blame for his lack of sexual drive, leaving her with the feeling of not being attractive enough for him. She tried fixing herself up and created ambiances for the perfect setup. Nothing worked. She felt he was distancing himself from her. From his perspective, this was far from the truth. He loved her and didn’t have the means to discuss what was happening to him.
We were able to work through the issues of his “shutting down” his sexual desires. In a past relationship, he was put down by his ex-partner. As a result, he developed an unconscious belief to protect himself from any future put-downs. This belief was triggered by a trivial action or remark of his present mate which caused him to sexually shut down completely. Once these unconscious beliefs were balanced and resolved, he and his partner were able to enjoy their intimate relation again.